I'm goin home! My God! Is it really me? For the first time in my life, I don't want to go back home!

I can't understand it! After all, my family is there, without whom I can't live, all my friends are there, my city, and my whole life! I tried to sort out my feelings and put everything in order!

Alas, I couldn't do it! My emotions were too sharp and bright to understand anything there!

But now everything has calmed down! I'm sitting in my own room, remembering everything, and trying to understand, even now, what kept me there? What did I have there that I don't have here? Why do I want to bring it all back, or rather repeat it (perhaps in different shades)? Why? Why?

_The first thing I guess is that very freedom I already wrote about on my first page!

_And of course, independence! For all these months, only I was responsible for my actions and words. Only I could decide how to act in a certain situation. You know? It's like, if you live with someone, you get used to that person over time, and it's the same here! It's as if I lived with someone, with my second self, who was always there, advising, supporting, being proud, happy for me, etc. And in the end, I got very used to it! Of course, it's always with me here too! And not just for me. All people are built this way! They can ask themselves something, answer it themselves, if it's hard - comfort themselves, etc. I mean, it's always with me. But it was completely different there) more thoughtful, active, cheerful, and wiser! I really liked how it worked))) In a word, it opened up to me, and I got to know it from different sides that I hadn't had to before! That's it! I probably didn't want to say goodbye to it! After all, there was no guarantee that when I came back here, it would remain the same, wouldn't change!

_I don't know if it was just me or if it's just human nature! I think I didn't want to say goodbye to my dream. (I can't say that I had the feeling that I wouldn't return there, on the contrary, for some reason I felt that I was saying goodbye for a short time)

Not so much to the dream, but to those emotions that it gave me! After all, a dream that once became reality is unlikely to return to its status as a dream! Perhaps it will be a very strong desire, but a dream... hmm... I doubt it!

And probably, with this feeling, I was sorry to part with it, "that I won't dream about America so strongly anymore! It already has a different status in my heart")

In no case was I disappointed, on the contrary, I was proud that I had a worthy one (and this is very important - not to be broken by your own dream! It is very painful when you realize that all the effort, time, and emotions were spent on a goal that wasn't worth it (( In such cases, it is probably better that it remained unrealized, just as sweet... let it be distant.

Thank God, this didn't happen to me! Which I am incredibly happy about!

I am glad that I brought with me many unforgettable impressions, memories, improved my English, found good friends, became more independent and confident, saw a different life, a culture that is so different from ours!

.....And so we were let onto the plane! There was time before takeoff... to think, to calm down! I tried to remember all the good things I had in this beautiful country, gathered a bunch of positive things, and said to myself:

"This is the most precious thing I'm taking with me! No one will take this away from me! So why am I crying? I should be happy) And with tears in my eyes, but with a slight smile, I thought I'm goin home) Mama I'm comin home to you

God, I'm crying even now........

P.S. Never was so emotional! Really! That’s America's fault hahha))))

In Love With It!!!!