WORK

"Work is a special place where you don't have to think," a phrase from Grishkovets' play "Planet," spoken by him. At "Mavericks," I'm like a robot or a zombie, especially after midnight—I just do everything on autopilot. It's fine if I'm on the same shift as Ira or Katya (they don't work every day). And it's okay if we manage to chat and find a topic. Sometimes I talk a little with Tubani, one of the bartenders, as much as my meager vocabulary allows.

Today, Katya, James—her boyfriend, and his brother went to play "Paintball." I haven't played war games in so long! It was quite fun. My "hundred-year-old self" had occupied such an absolute part of me for so long that "somehow I didn't really want to, there was no enthusiasm."

Yesterday, when Katya and I were just agreeing on this event, I told her (and we only had about three hours of sleep today after work, having worked like crazy all week at a wild pace): "I'll be playing like a zombie tomorrow. Walking like the dead from 'Resident Evil' and taking everyone down with my bare hands, no ammo!" ?

SECOND MEETING

— What should I call you? You're waiting for me to guess myself. I lost sight of you for so long! And now I've found you again. But you were always there. I just forgot...

— And do you remember, before you were thirteen, everyone called you Senya? It's even strange to say that name now. I want to tell you that in the future, at nineteen, when you find out that Senya is a short form of Arseny, you will be incredibly happy, not knowing who to thank for such happiness—the full legitimacy of bearing the name Syoma! It's not easy for me now to just, say, without blinking an eye, do something as colossal as what you will accomplish in your time for me today. What am I talking about? You will give up the name Senya. Forever. It will be replaced by the name Syoma, which until then you had only heard from a couple of people addressing you. And in terms of sound, it's almost sweet to you now. In today's time, I've completely gotten used to it, no longer being Senya for most of my life! AND THIS IS YOUR MERIT! YOU DID THIS! And it would be, at the very least, a betrayal on my part to come up with another name or nickname for you now, when you've done so much for me and when your dream is right there. And how can you take a dream away from a person?! Never!!! No-no-no-no-no! (pronounced like in the movie "You Don't Mess with the Zohan")

It's one thing to convince someone regarding their views on certain things, or to change your own. But a dream! This is a completely special phenomenon! And a person cannot (most often) wish for something bad for themselves in their dreams!

So you are Syoma. And I am Semyon. Especially since I'm a hundred years old. But we are one person! That's why my close and loved ones see you in me and call me Syoma or Syomka. I like it. And even when it's Syomych, Syomsky, or, as Yulia called me a couple of times—Syomga (it sounded cute from her, but I hope no one else calls me that). And Zhenka, sometimes Olya and another Yulia—Syomkin. Any option is good. I also like Semyon. Even if it "just turned a hundred." What can you do! But all this, of course, also depends on the person addressing me.

GAME

In the eleventh hour, we arrived at the paintball field. We were handed guns with balls filled with paint. About twelve people were playing. We were divided into two teams—defending the post and attacking.

— Today is your day! I want to let you be me now, — I said to Syoma.

He didn't "turn on" immediately, only by the second round. But then! We put on camouflage suits, masks, and forward for the motherland.

We played two rounds. The first one was short, I only took out a couple of people before I was shot. But in the second, I made up for it.

I was defending the post at first until all of ours were taken out. Then they hit me too, but at the last moment, the last living player on our team saved me. I spun around, ran behind the opponent from the back. With four shots, I took down three at once! Just like Rambo! ? Greetings to you, Sylvester Stallone! You are my idol! Respect and honor!

Then I revived as many as three (!!!) members of my team. And then, when our defense was back together, we ran, took out, and hammered the opponent. I was jumping like a "mountain goat," diving behind barriers, escaping bullets, and then suddenly popping out, attacking the "enemy," who wasn't sleeping either and was reviving "their own." For some reason, no one was jumping, crawling, or giving their all like I was.

Because Syoma can't do it any other way! He either fights or lies on the couch! No options! And everyone around was running, walking, or moving on all fours, staring around.

After the intense game, I felt like I had gone to a PE class after a long absence. Ah! Exciting! And also... we won!

In the second team, there were only men, and we had, besides me and James with his brother—Katya and two other women! Although it's presumptuous, I want to brag (without false modesty): we won thanks to me!!! Hooray! I defended the honor of Russia! The motherland will not forget me, it shouldn't!

Although... No-no-no-no-no-no!

— Actually, we won thanks to you, Syom! And... you know, Pavel would be proud of you! Especially that boy Pavel—your best friend!

He smiles at me shyly.

— Thanks! The gun is cool! Well, I'll go, see you again, right?!

— Of course! Never leave me again!

ONE MORE NAME

By the way, I forgot to mention one more form of my name that I've completely gotten used to and have come to love. That name is Simon. When I first arrived in England in the summer of 2003, my supervisor, who was struggling to pronounce "Semyon," finally declared something like:

— O! Your name it’s Simon! Okay?!

— Okay, — I simply replied. ?

Since then, I introduce myself to all foreigners as Simon. And in general, I'm fine with this form of the name. And it's easy for them to pronounce. And no one asks five times like when you introduce yourself as "Semyon."

November 02, 2008